Fun With Jane And Jane Alternate Ending
by Light Seeker 001
Summary: In which Peggy and Luanne join the Omega House and become members of the ranch.


Blonde Jane and Aunt Jane, previously known as Luanne Platter and Peggy Hill respectively, packed all their clothes as they waited for the bus. For the past several days, the two had been unable to go to the bathroom, eat very little and unable to think of nothing but jams and jellies. At first, it made their stomaches hurt. But after a while, they were happy selling jams and jellies with their friends.

You know what I love about this place," Aunt Jane asked. "Nobody ever gets tired of hearing about me. My hobbies, favorite movies..." She paused and added with a hint of anger, "my deep seated resentment towards my soul-crushing mother!"

Blonde Jane lied down on the bed with her hands behind her head. "It never has to end, Aunt Jane. See, once we get to the ranch,\nit's gonna be so beautiful and peaceful. Just like a tanning bed."

"You know, at first I thought I was dizzy from hunger. Now I realize it is from bliss."

(!)

Jane and Aunt Jane sat in a circle with their sorority sisters, chanting "Jam, jelly" when the frat leader Jane entered the living room. "Janes, the bus is here! Leave everything from your old lives behind! Except work gloves, you'll need those."

(!)

Still holding hands, the sorority sisters entered the bus and took their seats. Blonde Jane was holding onto Aunt Jane. This was it. No more worrying about Bobby being embarrassing, no more having friends that don't take her seriously, no more putting up with Hank and his business plans interfering with their romantic moments. And most of all, she no longer had to stop worrying about trying to be good enough to impress her overbearing mother.

Blonde Jane was excited too. For once she will have real friends, no longer will she stand out and no longer will people think she's weird or a hillbilly freak.

"Okay, everyone," the sorority leader said. "This is it! The journey to a new world! And of selling jams and jellies to markets." She sat in the driver's seat and turned on the ignition. And as the bus left the sorority house, Aunt Jane and Jane looked out the window, silently saying goodbye to their lives in Arlen, Texas.

(!)

The bus arrived at the ranch a few hours later. It was your typical ranch, but instead of animals, there were plants and fruits growing around the red barn with the omega symbol painted on the side. "Here we are," the sorority leader said, opening the door.

The Janes exited the bus where they were greeted by an older woman in the kind of clothes one's grandmother would wear. It was the founder Jane, the woman in the painting above the Omega House's mantel. "Welcome Jane," she said to the sorority leader. They gave each other a hug. She glanced at the girls and gave them a smile. "Are these girls ready?"

"They are. They are ready for the peaceful life of working at the ranch. No longer do they care about their old lives, their insecurities or their faults."

"Good, good. I also hope they are ready for making the jams and jellies and selling them." She stopped when she saw Aunt Jane. "Who is this? She's too old to be a sorority girl."

"This is my Aunt Jane," Blonde Jane said. "She wishes to work with us."

"Really?"

"And I must say," Aunt Jane said, shaking hands with Jane. "Your jams and jellies are delicious. Why, I could have used them on my toasts every day."

"Thank you. Though, I must ask, are you qualified for working on my ranch."

"Well, I used to work on a ranch before I got married. This was before I moved to Arlen, and I was under the oppression of my mother..."

Jane put a finger to Aunt Jane's lips. "Shush. I don't need to know who you were. Just tell me, what can you do?"

"Well, I am capable of gardening if that's what you're asking. And mending fences, and spreading manure, plowing...do I need to go on?"

Jane nodded. "Good. That's all I needed to hear. And we could use someone with your experience." She turned to the other girls. "As of today, you are all workers for my ranch. You will all be growing, farming and selling jams and jellies. Nothing else matters! And as a reward for making it this far, you are allowed to use your first bathroom break and a snack here on my ranch." All the girls sighed in relief. "And starting tomorrow, breakfast. I know how much you must be hungry." The girls nodded. "Good. For now, tuck in. Jane," she turned to sorority leader. "Will escort you to your sleeping quarters."

(!)

"Farewell, my sisters," Jane said to the sorority sisters. "Hopefully, we will meet each other again when the next batch comes." She closed the door and headed back to the bus

The girls unpacked their stuff and placed them under their bunk beds. Suddenly, Blonde Jane caught a glimpse of a familiar face already making her bed. "Jane?"

An Asian girl with long, dark hair turned around. "Jane?"

"How did you get here? I haven't seen you since I first came to the Omega House!"

Jane sat on her bunk sadly. "Some woman found me and tried to brainwash me. Told me I was her daughter. Thankfully I managed to run away and come straight to the ranch." She scoffed. "I think I would remember what my mother would look like." She paused. "Hmm. I can't think of what she looked like."

"Well, it doesn't matter. You're here. My first friend in a sorority, and my first friend to introduce me to this ranch."

Jane smiled. "I'm glad we met, Jane."

"So do I."

One of the workers who oversaw the new meat shouted, "Lights out in five minutes!"

Aunt Jane set her glasses down next to the bedside table and got herself under the covers.

"Aunt Jane?"

"Yes, Jane?"

"Do you feel regret coming here?"

"Hmm...no. Not really."

"Good. Neither do I."

Aunt Jane feel asleep after talking to her niece. It was funny, but for a minute she thought of propane, but that had nothing to do with her new life at the ranch. Oh, well.

(!)

Work began at 5:00 AM. Nobody complained. They were trained to wake up at five back at the sorority. The Janes were given the tasks of tending the crops, plucking fruit and taking them to the barn, where the other girls would crush the fruit into jams and jellies and store them in barrels. After there was enough, the Janes would take jars and fill them with jams and jellies, put them and boxes and bring them to trucks. The Janes would then deliver the jams and jellies and sell them at stores, markets, shops and trading posts, making tons of money. Aunt Jane was tasked with being one of the overseers, making sure everything ran smoothly and without incident. Aunt Jane was also given the job to help the Janes if they're having trouble with the work thanks to her previous experience working at the ranch.

If one of the Janes suddenly started to remember she old lives, she would be taken to a shack to reenforce the Omega House's beliefs. After a day in the shack, she would return to work, thinner but happier. She would be given food after she makes up for her time in the shack. The Omega House was a well oiled machine and business was a success thanks to the scam of acting as a sorority. And nobody came looking for them, at least that's what they were told to believe, and unsurprisingly, they didn't care. And over time, the Janes got so used to the schedule, that they became like robots: unfeeling, uncaring, and stuck in a constant schedule of working, sleeping and rinse and repeat.

Besides, people loved their jams and jellies. Who would want to take away the happiness the people felt when they put it on their crackers and bread? Nobody. Besides, all things considered, the Janes didn't mind.


End file.
